Mad Bush

Mad Bush

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Celibrity Couple

Celibrity Couple

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Our Future

Our Future

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Bush VS Monkey

Bush VS Monkey

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Bush Cow

Bush Cow

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Obama in Fair & Lovely Advertisement

Obama in Fair & Lovely Advertisement

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The Clinton Memorial

The Clinton Memorial

Outsourcing the American Presidency to India

Outsourcing the American Presidency to India

Washington, DC -- Congress today announced that the office of President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of March 1, 2008.

The move is being made in order to save the President's $500,000 yearly salary, and also a record $521 billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead that his office has incurred during the last 5 years. It is anticipated that $231 billion can be saved to the end of the President's term. "We believe this is a wise financial move. The cost savings are huge," stated Congressman Thomas Reynolds (R-WA).

"We cannot remain competitive on the world stage with the current level of cash outlay," Reynolds noted. Mr. Bush was informed by e-mail this morning of his termination. Preparations for the job move have been underway for some time. Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai , India will assume the office of President as of September 1, 2007.

Mr. Singh was born in the United States while his Indian parents were vacationing at Niagara Falls, NY, thus making him eligible for the position. He will receive a salary of $320 (USD) a month, but no health coverage or other benefits. It is believed that Mr. Singh will be able to handle his job responsibilities without a support staff. Due to the time difference between the US and India, he will be working primarily at night. "Working nights will allow me to keep my day job at the Dell Computer call center," stated Mr. Singh in an exclusive interview.

"I am excited about this position. I always hoped I would be President." A Congressional spokesperson noted that while Mr. Singh may not be fully aware of all the issues involved in the office of President, this should not be a problem asPresident Bush had never been familiar with the issues either. Mr. Singh will rely upon a script tree that will enable him to respond effectively to most topics of concern. Using these canned responses, he can address common concerns without having to understand the underlying issue at all. "We know these scripting tools work," stated the spokesperson.

"President Bush has used them successfully for years, with the result that some people actually thought he knew what he was talking about." Bush will receive health coverage, expenses, and salary until his final day of employment.

Following a two-week waiting period, he will be eligible for $140 a week unemployment for 26 weeks. Unfortunately he will not be eligible for Medicaid, as his unemployment benefits will exceed the allowed limit.

Mr. Bush has been provided with the outplacement services of Manpower, Inc. to help him write a resume and prepare for his upcoming job transition. According to Manpower, Mr. Bush may have difficulties in securing a new position due to a lack of any successful work experience during his lifetime.

A greeter position at Wal-Mart was suggested due to Bush's extensive experience at shaking hands, as well as his special smile.

Al Gore VS Clinton Family

Al Gore VS Clinton Family

Al Gore and the Clintons are flying on Air Force One.

Clinton looks at Gore, and chuckles and says, “You know I could throw a $10,000 dollar bill out the window right now and make one person very happy.” Gore shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, “Well I could throw ten $1,000 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy.” 

Hillary tosses her perfectly sprayed hair and says, “Of course, then, I could throw one hundred $100 bills out the window and make one hundred pepole very happy.”

Chelsea rolls her eyes, looks at all of them and says, “I could throw all of you out the window and make the WHOLE COUNTRY HAPPY!”

New Dog Will Soon Arrive In White House

New Dog Will Soon Arrive In White House

U.S. President Barack Obama recently gave an interview on "The Tonight Show With Jay Leno".


Here he said that soon White House would be fullfilled with a new dog. He said that the dog would arrive after his planned trip to Europe in early April.


Obama added that his daughters Sasha and Malia were not the only ones looking forward to its arrival. "They say if you want a friend in Washington, get a dog," he joked. Bureau Report

Jokes Of The Day

Jokes Of The Day

President Obama, First Lady Micchel and Joe Biden were flying on Air Force One.


Obama looked at Micchel, chuckled and said, ‘You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy.’


Micchel shrugged her shoulders and replied, ‘I could throw ten $100 bills out of the window and make ten people very happy.’


Biden added, ‘That being the case, I could throw one hundred $10 bills out of the window and make a hundred people very happy.’


Hearing their exchange, the pilot Rolled his eyes and said to his co-pilot, ‘Such big-shots back there.


Sh*t I could throw all of their @sses out of the window and make 56 million people very happy.’

Potty Mouthed US President Barack Obama

Potty Mouthed US President Barack Obama

The kind of language which Obama not normally associated with a US President is spreading like wildfire online.

The clips are from the audiobook version of Obama's autobiography, Dreams from my Father, which is read by the president himself.

They include quotes attributed to a schoolfriend of Obama's who had a rich vocabulary which is reproduced in graphic detail in the book.

US actress April Winchell has posted audio clips of President Barack Obama reading some of Ray's fruitier expressions on her website, www.aprilwinchell.com.

She writes: "You're about to hear the President of United States using language that would finish Cheney off once and for all."

Obama's Half Brother Arrested

Obama's Half Brother Arrested

U.S. President Barack Obama's half brother was arrested at his home in a slum on suspicion of drugs' possession.



"I think it was a misunderstanding. I do not do drugs," George Hussein Obama, 27, told Reuters from Nairobi's Huruma slum, where he was picked up for a few hours on Saturday.


"They released me with no charge."


Local media quoted police saying Obama, who works as a mechanic, had been found with two rolls of marijuana.


Kenya's leading newspaper, the Nation, said he would be charged in court on Monday.


But Obama said that was untrue, and police officials refused to comment.


"I don't know what you are talking about," area police chief Jasper Ombati told Reuters, before hanging up the phone.


George Obama hardly knows his brother, the first black president of the United States, who is hero-worshipped in Kenya due to his ancestral roots.

The White House declined comment.

Several of President Obama’s Kenyan relatives went to Washington, DC, for his inauguration, but George was not among them. He lives in Huruma with extended family.

Media reports about him surfaced over the summer, after a magazine article said he lived in a shack and earned a dollar a day. George Obama has called the reports insulting.

“I’m proud of how I live,” he said in an interview over the summer. “[The media] are tarnishing the family name.”

He also said he was studying to be a mechanic and works with a local youth group in Huruma.

In President Obama’s book Dreams From My Father , he describes George Obama as “a handsome, roundheaded boy with a wary gaze”.

George is the youngest of the senior Obama’s seven children, born six months before his father died.

Dolls Were Forced To Rename

Dolls Were Forced To Rename

A US toy company is renaming its Malia and Sasha dolls after a complaint by First Lady Michelle Obama.

The dolls, originally called Marvelous Malia and Sweet Sasha, will be named 'Marvelous Mariah' and 'Sweet Sydney'.

Dollmaker Ty Inc says it changed the names after Mrs Obama said that using her daughters' names was inappropriate.

It had said the dolls were not modelled on the Obama girls, but the names suited dolls they were already making."We appreciate the company's response to this matter," said Mrs Obama's press secretary, Katie McCormick Lelyveld.

Barack and Michelle Obama have two daughters: Malia Ann was born in 1998 and Sasha was born in 2001. Sasha is the youngest child to reside in the White House since. Malia and Sasha attend the private Sidwell Friends School in Washington, DC, the same school as attended by Chelsea Clinton, Tricia Nixon Cox, and Archibald Roosevelt.

The dolls were part of the Ty Girlz Collection, and went on sale in January, joining others in the same range called Bubbly Britney, Lucky Lindsay and Precious Paris.

Obama Registered As A Brand Ambassador For Fair And Lovely

Duplicate Obama

Duplicate Obama

Pooping Obama is a best-seller

Pooping Obama is a best-seller

Tiny plastic figures of Barack Obama and Gordon Brown relieving themselves in public have become online bestsellers.

They are among a host of politicians, sports stars and celebrities to be given the dubious honour of being turned into a 'caganer'.

Catalonians traditionally celebrate Christmas by placing a caganer, which translates as pooper, in a nativity scene.

People find it fun to try to spot the tiny defecating figures which are supposed to bring prosperity and a good harvest.

Traditionally, caganers would be small bearded men in full Catalan costume but these days, it's more likely to be a celebrity. Last year, Barcelona footballer Thierry Henry was the most popular figure sold.

But this year, internet orders from the rest of the world, especially the US, have made Barack Obama the best-seller.

Others immortalised into the mini figures include Mr Brown, French President Nicolas Sarkozy and wife Carla Bruni, plus Spanish tennis star Rafael Nadal.

First class all the way!

First class all the way!

Last week we presented a collage of what sort of people our government has to deal with. If you thought that is a Herculean task, spare a moment for Barack Hussein Obama, who is to be sworn in within hours of my dispatching this as the 44th president of the USA.

He is the first black to head the White House. He is the first African descendant to man the oval office. He is the first of Muslim parentage to order the withdrawal of troops from Iraq, the Vietnam of the Middle East. And indeed, he has to be first class if he hopes to take out the American nose from the problem pies they have baked, for not all those who voted for him are. Here are some anecdotes (received by email) from the country that GWB (Gone with the Wind Bush), the most unpopular US president ever, ruled for eight treacherous years.

The first black president of the US, Barack Obama.

A woman called in to the toxicology dept at Chicago's poison control centre. She was very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. The doctor quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. And you thought there were no ants in America, only aunts.

Last year, some Boeing employees decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming toward them. It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locater beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing. And you thought there were thieves only in Biman.

A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this, 'Put all your money in this bag.' While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller.

She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbour, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip, and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, 'OK' and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America. And you thought you have to stand in line only in Bangladesh.

A NY motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40. And you thought rightly that they make faster cars for nothing.

A guy walked into a little corner store in Kansas City with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, 'Because I don't believe you are over 21.' At this point, the robber gave his driver's license to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later. And you thought Scotch is good for health.

Seems this Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems the liquor store window was made of extra hardened glass. And you thought shop windows are attacked only during hartal.

In semi-rural Weyauwega in Wisconsin, a new-in-the-neighbourhood guy called the local township administrative office to request the removal of the 'Deer Crossing' sign on the road. His reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! - I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.' And you thought the only way to make deer extinct was to send them to the Sundarbans.

Lego Obama Takes the Oath

Lego Obama Takes the Oath

Legoland has stolen a march on the real world by creating an incredibly detailed model of Barack Obama's inauguration as US President.


The model version is already the main attraction at the California theme park - ahead of the highly anticipated real thing.


Lego master craftsmen created a model White House, motorcade, Mr Obama and his whole family - and even queues to the porta-loos.


More than 1,000 mini Lego people surround the construction, with onlookers including outgoing George W Bush and Hillary and Bill Clinton.


Obama's daughters Sasha and Malia are also depicted, standing proudly behind the president-elect as he takes the presidential oath of office on the steps of the Capitol