Weird Quiz

Weird Quiz

Que : You have two hourglasses--a 4-minute glass and a 7-minute glass.


You want to measure 9 minutes. How do you do it?

Ans : Start both hourglasses. When the 4-minute glass runs out, turn it
over (4 minutes elapsed). When the 7-minute glass runs out, turn
it over (7 minutes elapsed). When the 4-minute glass runs out this
time (8 minutes elapsed), the 7-minute glass has been running for
1 minute. Turn it over once again. When it stops, 9 minutes have
elapsed.

The News We Dont Want To Hear

The News We Dont Want To Hear

The Communist Manifesto as read by Ronald Reagan

The Torah as read by Louis Farrakhan

The Koran as read by Salman Rushdie

The Anarchist's Cookbook as read by Theodore Kaczinsky

How To win Friends and Influence People as read by Dennis Rodman

Europe on $10 a Day as read by Steve Forbes

The Godfather as read by John Gotti

Uncle Tom's Cabin as read by George Wallace

I'm Ok You're Ok as read by Rush Limbaugh

Moby Dick as read by Jonah

Crime and Punishment as read by OJ Simpson

A Tale of Two Cities as read by Ed Koch and Rudi Giuliani

The Gulag Archipelago as read by Josef Stalin

Feynman's Lectures On Physics as read by Dan Quayle

The Joy of Cooking as read by Hannibal Lecter

The Wealth of Nations as read by Fidel Castro

Weird Jokes

Weird Jokes

@ How many publishers does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to change it and two to hold down the author.

@ How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?

"Do we have to get author's approval for this?"

Two, one to change the bulb and one to issue a rejection slip to the old bulb.

@ How many proofreaders does it take to change a light bulb?

Proofreaders aren't supposed to change light bulbs. They should just query them.

@ How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to screw it in almost all the way in and the other to give it a suprising twist at the end.

@ How many writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb and one to tell a long story about it.

@ How many literary critics does it take to change a light bulb?

Literary critics don't know how, but rest assured they'll find something wrong with the way you do it.

Tips For Good Writing

Tips For Good Writing

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.


2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.


3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)


4. Employ the vernacular.


5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.


6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.


7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.


8. Contractions aren't necessary.


9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.


10. One should never generalize.


11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."


12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.


13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.


14. Profanity sucks.


15. Be more or less specific.


16. Understatement is always best.


17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.


18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.


19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.


20. The passive voice is to be avoided.


21. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.


22. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.


23. Who needs rhetorical questions?

Elephant Books In Different Langguages

Elephant Books In Different Langguages

The French book The English book The Welsh book The American book The Japanese book The Finnish book The German book The Icelandic book The Canadian book The Swedish book The Swiss book The Israeli book The Danish book

The Sex Life of the Elephant Elephants I have Shot on Safari The Elephant and its Influence on Welsh Language and Culture How to Make Bigger and Better Elephants How to Make Smaller and Cheaper Elephants What Do Elephants Think about Finnish People A Short Introduction to Elephants, Vol 1-6 Defrosting an Elephant Elephants: A Federal or State Issue? How to Reduce your Taxes with an Elephant The Country Through Which Hannibal Went With His Elephants The Elephant and the Jewish Problem Elephants - 100 easy ways of cooking them

Potty Mouthed US President Barack Obama

Potty Mouthed US President Barack Obama

The kind of language which Obama not normally associated with a US President is spreading like wildfire online.

The clips are from the audiobook version of Obama's autobiography, Dreams from my Father, which is read by the president himself.

They include quotes attributed to a schoolfriend of Obama's who had a rich vocabulary which is reproduced in graphic detail in the book.

US actress April Winchell has posted audio clips of President Barack Obama reading some of Ray's fruitier expressions on her website, www.aprilwinchell.com.

She writes: "You're about to hear the President of United States using language that would finish Cheney off once and for all."

HISTORICAL DAY

• 1663 - Earthquake in Canada
• 1887 - Snow falls on SF
• 1917 - Present Mexican constitution adopted
• 1921 - Yankees purchase 20 acres in the Bronx for Yankee Stadium
• 1937 - FDR proposes enlarging Supreme Court - plan failed "court packing"
• 1953 - Walt Disney's "Peter Pan" released
• 1963 - Maarten Schmidt discovers enormous red shifts in quasars
• 1971 - US Apollo 14 - 3rd manned expedition to moon - lands near Fra Mauro
• 1974 - US Mariner 10 returns 1st close-up photos of Venus's cloud structure
• 1979 - According to Census Bureau - US population reaches 200 million

FAMOUS BIRTHDAY

• 1723 - John Witherspoon, clergyman & signer of Declaration of Independence
• 1744 - John Jeffries, colonial physician & meteorologist
• 1778 - Sir Robert Peel, (C) British P.M. (1834-46) & founder of Tories
• 1837 - Evangelist Dwight Lyman Moody,
• 1840 - John Boyd Dunlop, developed pneumatic rubber tire
• 1848 - Belle Starr, of the wild west
• 1878 - Andre-Gustave Citron, French auto maker
• 1900 - Adlai Stevenson, (D) Ill gov & pres candidate
• 1906 - John Carradine, actor
• 1907 - Norton Simon, business executive
• 1914 - William Burroughs, U.S. novelist (Naked Lunch)
• 1919 - Red Buttons, comedian/Actor
• 1926 - Arthur Ochs Sulzberger, publisher (NY Times)
• 1934 - Hank Aaron, baseball player (record 755 HR's)
• 1939 - Jane Bryant Quinn, newscaster
• 1946 - Charlotte Rampling, in England
• 1948 - Barbara Hershey, in Atlanta Georgia
• 1951 - Elizabeth Swados, American composer & playwright

Dhaka University - Oxford of the East

Dhaka University - Oxford of the East

The University of Dhaka is the oldest university in Bangladesh. the university worked hard to build up an outstanding record of academic achievement, earning for itself the reputation for being the 'Oxford of the East'. The university contributed to the emergence of a generation of leaders who distinguished themselves in different occupations in East Bengal.


It could be said that Dhaka University is the soul of the country.Why? Because DU is partly the reason of our independence. If the students of this university had not raised their voices against the Pakistanis, then probably we would not have been independent (at least I would not have been sitting here writing this article). In 1952, it was the students of this very university who made Bengali the national language of this country. Today we can speak in Bengali freely in streets, at school or at home because of this martyrs. They sacrificed their lives for this language. And it is said that this fight for language finally led the way to our independence. It took 20 years for our brave warriors to raise their voices and claim for independence.

Though DU is the root cause of our independence strange as it might seem we have yet failed to express our gratitude to this university. The families of these great warriors are now leading the worse lives than anyone can imagine. Most of them even find it difficult to afford a day's meal. And what about the DU? What else could be said? It is no longer the Oxford of the East. The sole reason is the increasing corruption of this country. It remains as a forgotten part of the country. The DU which made the existence of this country possible is now increasingly criticized by the country folks. In fact, it no longer remains an educational institute. It is now the grounds of politics. Even the students who are living in the DU halls are among the ones who are badly reputed in the country. So parents even if they are happy that their children are the students of this infamous university yet again they are worried for the same reason.

DU is increasingly used by our beloved politicians for their own benefits. It is now the cause of the regular strikes, conflicts between the students and the police and all other crisis in the country. The country has long been failed to encourage foreign investment for all these reasons and that's why our country is still one of the poorest and the least developing countries in this world. DU once encouraged the students to protest and claim their rights. Today, DU is discouraging them to do so. The first years fail to get a place in the halls because of the session jam the students of the previous batches have not yet left the halls.

Furthermore, even the students who have graduated from the DU but yet they are poor, having been failed to get a proper job, bribe the authority so that they do not lose their place in the DU hall. For instance, recently a first year student raised his voice against the seniors claiming his right over a room in the hall. The seniors instead threatened him and threw him out of the hall. Now he has to come all the way from Narayanganj to do the class and then leave after his classes end. NO other students protested and I doubt whether anyone would ever again because who wants to face the same outcome?

Strictly speaking, Bangladesh is still alive because of the existence of the DU. Bangladesh is still alive because of the DU. But what a pity? It is the DU for which there is a fear in each and every one of our hearts as anything violent might happen at any instant.

Alcohol Quotes

Alcohol Quotes

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. --Frank Sinatra


Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat hairy girls. --Timothy Walsh


A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. --Anonymous


When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. --Henny Youngman


24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? --Stephen Wright


When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven... --Brian O'Rourke


You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline... it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. --Frank Zappa


Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. --Winston Churchill


Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. --Dave Barry


The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. --Humphrey


Bogart I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer. --Homer Simpson